Marriage in Islam is a huge responsibility, a big relationship yet the proper way to make it work is to take care of the little things and make them work. A series of little things taken care of properly will ensure that the relationship of marriage, even with its bumps and bruises, has a steady sail. So make sure you give the tiny things in your marriage complete priority and the big things will sort themselves out.
When Allah made us as human beings and sent us to this world He knew we would not fit in it because in truth He did not make us for this world, which has good and bad both. He made us for Paradise which is only good. So He ofcourse accepts that we are imperfect here. Again and again in the Quran, Allah has asked us to be tolerant, be patient and be resilient. But as humans we can never be perfect and hence our intolerance is shown in various acts of life. Marriage is one such relationship where our tolerance is tested the most.
Tiny things, when go wrong in the communication between husband and wife, can escalate to much bigger things and eventually separation between husband and wife. We must not let that happen. We must give importance where it is due. Tiny things like a husband forgetting to compliment his wife, a wife paying no attention to the success of the husband’s presentation at work, not replying to your wife’s message in time, not bringing home your husband’s favourite snack; all these things can escalate into arguments which can turn ugly very soon.
The Holy Prophet (PBUH) always took note of giving the tiny things priority in his marriage. He used to help his wives in the kitchen when they were tired, he used to joke with his wives to lighten the mood on a tough day and he used to complement their cooking. In short he used to make an EFFORT to remember the little things, those that make the spouse feel good about themselves as well as the relationship they were in.
So next time you think that phone call you didn’t answer because you didn’t feel like it was not important, think again? Call back, text back or better yet go home with roses. Be simple and give the simple things priority in life. Put your heart in your relationship and take note of what you could do to make it thrive. Work on it and the bigger issues will see themselves settle down with the Grace of Allah.
