When people talk about the perfect example of team work in marriage one’s mind always shoots to the marriage of the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) with Hazrat Khadija or that of his marriage to Hazrat Ayesha. The level of team work in their marriage and their relationship was so effortless that even after more than a thousand years, we still follow them and marvel at them, yet most of us do not seem to learn from them.
Like all relationships, marriage too is a two way street. If one person is making all the efforts to make it work and the other is not, it is most likely that the marriage will fail, sooner rather than later. The Holy Prophet said that in marriage there are compromises, patience, love and harmony from both sides, and he showed that to people in his life. But was he alone in making his marriage work? No. His wives played an equal part in their marriages to foster. When Ayesha needed help at home, the Holy Prophet helped her, even so much as washing the dishes. When no one believed the Holy Prophet (PBUH) and his message of Islam, Khadija believed him and stood by his side. THAT was love. THAT was team work.
In Islam marriage is exactly that kind of a relationship. Your life partner is not your servant, they are your team. Allah may have given the one more strength than the other but a great leader needs a great team and that is what marriage is all about. Accept that your team mate will have difficult days and you will be taking up the task of cheering them up, listening to them whine and then also accept that there will be times when you are having a bad time and your team mate (spouse) will set you on the right track. The rest of the times your life will be bliss.
So understand that marriage, like life in this world itself, is a roller coaster of a ride. Learn to live with each other, accept their flaws and take pride in their good points. This is the only way you and your spouse will be a team and work together for the rest of your lives.
